4am... again

Why hello there 4am? It seems like its been forever since we have been united... almost 24 hours!

Im not entirely sure why my child has decided that this is the perfect time to wake up EVERY MORNING THIS WEEK... but I can tell you right now... she is grounded for prom.

Being a mother is amazing... but sometimes it really leaves me feeling like I am at the end of my rapidly fraying rope just waiting for every ounce of my inner strength to give out on me. I am mentally, pyshically, and emotionally exhausted. I have to remind myself everyday, multiple times a day that I AM strong and that I can be patient. I know that I am a great mom, I love my daughter more than anything in this entire world and I am doing everything I can to raise her right... I know I can do it.. its just really hard to do it alone.

And lately alone is how I have been feeling. I see movies like Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, and it makes me sad because I honestly dont have any friends that I am close with. There is no one in my life that I know that if I needed something I could count on. Frankly all the people in my life that I would call my friends, dont treat me like friends whatsoever. They use me for my money, my car, and basically anything else they can get out of me. I remember the days of imaginary friends and I wish that I could go back and relive that. I wish that I had at least ONE real true friend that is always there for me no matter what... I guess you cant always get what you want. At least I know that I will always have my daughter by side.